obgy-no

as i've been thinking about this article going around, i was reminded of an experience i had with a doctor. i had my first obgyn experience as a premarital exam at the urging of my mother. before the exam, we sat in the doctor's office and he gave a little spiel. he recommended a specific lube, a book on intimacy in marriage, all fine. then he asked if i had been sexually active before. the question didn't bother me and is regularly asked in the medical community. but when i answered "no" he said, "good girl."

i thought it was weird even then, but was so anxious that i wasn't worrying about it. it didn't have some of the same dynamics as a bishop-young woman scenario, but the same power dynamic of older, specifically lds man obgyn-young woman was there. if i had said "yes" he probably wouldn't have said anything (hopefully). he has been a doctor to many women in my family, including my mom, and probably remembered we (or at least they, as far as he knew) are lds. but i still felt so ew about it.